Aikido - The Way of Asexual Harmony

Are you fighting feelings of blood-lust, rage, or just plain horniness?

Join our 40 year program to relieve you of all normal physical responses to:
- cold
- pain
- heat
- pain
- euphoria
- pain
- sexual stimulation
- did we say pain, yet?
- hunger
- and, drowsiness

Call now and we'll throw in True Enlightenment (tm). All for the LOW, LOW price of $10.95 (not including annual registration and grading fees).