Top Ten Differences between Aikido and Bullfighting...
- Bull won't take ukemi just to make you look good.
- In Aikido, if you muck up, you get to have another go.
- Bull fighters use capes while Aikidoka use skirts to confuse and confound.
- When you "defeat" uke in Aikido, you aren't awarded both ears and the tail.
- Most of the matadors have more bull shit than the bull.
- You don't cut off uke's balls and eat them when you've brought him to the ground.
- Aikidoka don't shit on the mat (usually).
- Success in shodan test is not followed by awarding two ears and a tail.
- Shouting "OLE" after a good performance is not generally approved.
- No roses thrown into the arena by the senoritas.
- There's no atemi in bull fighting...unless you're Mas Oyama.
- You may doubt about uke's morals, as they are humans (bulls are straight and sincere (makoto)...)
- "Horniness" may result in undesired pain, not pleasure.
- Generally Aikidoka do not attack with their head first.
- A bullfighter doesn't get to randori with six bulls at a time.
- If you do get 6 bulls at a time you run.
- A bull never looks at you unblinkingly, smiles and says "relax".