Murphy's Laws of Martial Arts
- The wimp who made it through the eliminations on luck alone will suddenly turn into Bruce Lee when you're up against him.
- The referee will always be looking the other way when you score.
- You will have trouble with the ties on your gi when members of the opposite sex are in class.
- The day you leave work early to make it to class in time, the sensei will be sick
- The sensei will only use you to demonstrate joint-locking techniques.
- If you have to use your training in self defence, your attacker's father will be a lawyer.
- After a flawless demonstration, you will trip on your way back to your seat.
- After years of training without a single injury, you will pull a muscle the night before your black belt exam.
- In an otherwise vacant locker room, the only other person will have the locker right next to yours.
- No matter how many times you take care of it beforehand, you will always
have to go to the toilet when it's your turn during belt promotion exams.