Murphy's Laws of Martial Arts

  1. The wimp who made it through the eliminations on luck alone will suddenly turn into Bruce Lee when you're up against him.
  2. The referee will always be looking the other way when you score.
  3. You will have trouble with the ties on your gi when members of the opposite sex are in class.
  4. The day you leave work early to make it to class in time, the sensei will be sick
  5. The sensei will only use you to demonstrate joint-locking techniques.
  6. If you have to use your training in self defence, your attacker's father will be a lawyer.
  7. After a flawless demonstration, you will trip on your way back to your seat.
  8. After years of training without a single injury, you will pull a muscle the night before your black belt exam.
  9. In an otherwise vacant locker room, the only other person will have the locker right next to yours.
  10. No matter how many times you take care of it beforehand, you will always have to go to the toilet when it's your turn during belt promotion exams.